Shining Through the Shadows-A Valentine's Day Tale
by lostsoul512
Summary: . No matter how much we loved each other, we would always have this desire to become each other. A love that bred hate that bred love, endlessly changing until our emotions were so blurred all that remained was a blind passion.


A/N: Happy Valentine's Day, guys! Well, I did promise you all a sappy story in honor of our favorite boys. Plus this is basically my present to my darling Sheridan who is, of course, my valentine. So, without further delay, here goes nothing. OH! Be prepared for fluff, excessive girly behavior, a sensitive Roger, and panda bears.

XXXJACK

"Have I ever mentioned that I hate flying?" I muttered, stopping where I stood to catch my balance. Airports were probably the liveliest places in the world, thousands of people coming and going. I took a moment to appreciate all the people pushing past me. Leaping into the arms of lovers, I thought. It was all so romantic.

Beside me, a beautiful blonde reached out to link his fingers with mine. Once upon a time I might have glanced around nervously to see who was watching but I was so far past that now. Ralph smiled at me, and I smiled back. Because when I was with him there was nothing else in the world.

"Well, we didn't crash," he said lightly. "So that's good."

I rolled my bright blue eyes, but gave his hand a tight squeeze. Behind me, I could hear Roger grumbling on about something, and when I turned to look I saw him holding up, basically supporting, a very pale Simon.

Things had been pretty steady for the past few years. We'd all fallen into this easy sort of routine, drawing strength from each other. That is, when we were annoying the hell out of each other. After the island, we'd all been pulled apart, but it didn't take us long to find each other again. Which just went to show that nothing could keep us separated.

Now, we found ourselves standing, dazed, in the middle of the terminal. Out the massive windows I could see the sun shining down upon the city of San Diego. I still couldn't believe we were here, although it hadnt taken much for Ralph to convince me. One look with those pale green eyes and I'd been like clay in his hands. Ralph had me so wrapped around his finger. And he knew it too.

Simon was, miraculously, still conscious. Head pressed to Roger's chest as the dark haired boy hugged him loosely, he offered a queasy smile. "Can we just go to the hotel?" He pleaded. Roger laughed darkly but kissed him softly on the forehead. And in our own little paradise, everything was just perfect.

XXXROGER

You're probably wondering why we were in San Diego.

Well, really, it was all Ralph's doing. He got it in his head that his life wouldn't be complete until he saw a living panda bear. Maybe because they were so peaceful and just wanted someone to rescue them, before they went extinct. Anyway, I thought it was all pretty stupid, but Jack couldn't ever say no to him. So we'd all packed our bags and jetted off across the world.

Considering our history, none of us were too fond of flying, so we were pretty damn happy when Ralph slid the key into our hotel room and let us all inside. Jack and I had gotten stuck with all the luggage, further proving that we were the men in the relationships. Sometimes it was still kind of strange to think of me and Simon as being together, but then he would grin at me and I would think of the way he held me. And everything else ceased to matter.

Dropping the suitcases I'd been hauling, I kicked the door shut and surveyed the room. We'd insisted upon two separate bedrooms with a common living room. Because, well, let's be honest. It was Valentine's Day, and if there was one thing I prided myself on, it was that I never did anything halfway.

Out of nowhere, Simon appeared and wrapped his arms around my waist. I loved how easily he fit into my arms, how his breaths tickled my neck just so. I loved his innocence, how wide his glowing eyes were in the dark. He was my light, my salvation, my everything.

"Hey," I murmured into his hair, eyes falling shut as I crushed him against me. "Feeling better?"

Simon nodded against my chest. I wondered absently if he could feel my heart beating, racing at his mere closeness. "Yeah, now that I'm in your arms." He pulled back just enough to look up at me, lips curved slightly as our eyes locked. "I was thinking-" he started, but before he could finish I pressed my lips against his.

Like always, I tried to be gentle. I always thought of Simon as being so damn breakable. So fragile. It was my job to keep him safe from all the pain and hurt the world would try to bring. But with his hands all fisted in my black hair, it was really hard to hold back. Hard to contain myself when all I wanted was to disappear under the sheets with him for a while.

Simon pulled away much too soon, gasping for breath as his hands slid down my chest. "Later," he whispered. I had every intention of protesting, but then Jack and Ralph came stumbling out of their own room, each looking quite a bit disheveled.

While I rolled my eyes at my two best friends, my lover just giggled. "Oh, shut up," Jack snapped, but it was teasing and playful. "It's Valentine's Day."

Ralph turned to look at the red head with some surprise. "Since when were you such a romantic?"

Jack crossed his arms. "I flew all the way out here, didn't I?" We all had to admit, he had a point. It had take all three of us to get him on that plane.

"Can we go now?" Ralph pleaded, grabbing one of Jack's hands between both of his own. Apparently he couldn't wait for the damn pandas any longer. Probably worried they'd all be dead before he got there.

"Yes, dear," Jack muttered, but it was only partially sarcastic. Mostly he just adored Ralph, worshipped the ground he walked on. Which was strange, because Jack was usually all about Jack. But then, I was usually all about nothing, and nowadays Simon was the entire world to me.

Ralph looked over at Simon and I, like for a moment he'd forgotten anyone but Jack existed. "Are you guys coming?"

"No," I said quickly. Somewhat because I hated public places, especially the zoo. But mostly because Simon was looking all kinds of irresistible. Jack raised his brows like he was onto me.

"Have fun!" Simon piped, and we all said goodbye, and they left.

XXXRALPH

"Ohmygosh! It was so cute. Did you see him, Jack? He was eating bamboo and just totally content with everything. I'd love to be a panda bear, you know. Would you still love me if I was a panda bear?"

I must have been rambling or something, because suddenly Jack grabbed me by the forearms and kissed me fiercely on the lips. My red-headed lover had a tendency of using kisses to shut me up when I was talking too much. I never could protest to his kissing.

We'd just gotten back into the hotel room after our lovely day together. Jack had taken me all over the zoo, saving the panda bears for last. At first, I'd simply stood, pressed against the glass, and admired them.

"They've got to be the second most adorable thing on earth," I'd said to Jack, who was standing beside me, looking sort of bored but happy to be where I was nonetheless.

"What's the first?" He asked, taking the bait I'd laid out.

I looked at him over my shoulder. "You, silly."

And I would have been okay with that, really. Just seeing the panda bears for five minutes would have been enough for me. But the best was never good enough for Jack, and because he was Jack Merridew he'd found a way to go way, way over the top. "Come with me," he said, holding out his hand. I took it without protest, letting him lead me to a door I hadnt quite noticed before.

"Where are we going?" I asked, unable to keep the excitement out of my voice. Jack pulled me through the door, where we were greeted by a brunette woman with glasses. When she smiled up at Jack, he held me a little closer to him. They said a few words that I barely heard, because there, across the room, was the door to the real, live panda bear exhibit.

"You wanna meet him?" Jack whispered, words meant only for me to hear. After that I'd pretty much lost it. Because Jack was amazing and this day was amazing and everything was just perfect.

Now, several hours later, we were back in the hotel room and Jack had me pinned up against the wall right behind the door. His lips were planting a trail of kisses all down my neck, tongue darting out to tease the flesh there. I couldn't help myself from moaning a little, before realizing that Simon and Roger were probably still awake.

"We should…go…to the bedroom," I managed between little gasps for breath. Jack met my eyes for but a moment before scooping me up in his arms like I weighed nothing whatsoever. I nuzzled my head against his shoulder, reveling in how safe I felt there. Wondering how the hell I'd managed to get so lucky, how this boy who had once been my enemy had become the center of my universe.

We passed Simon and Roger's room, but the door was already shut, which could only mean one thing. Not that I was really paying attention, not to anything except the way Jack held onto me. Soon we'd found our way into our own room, and then I was being laid down upon the bed, and Jack was upon me.

Our tongues met in a familiar dance, fighting for dominance over the other. Because, really, some things never changed. No matter how much we loved each other, we would always have this desire to become each other. A love that bred hate that bred love, endlessly changing until our emotions were so blurred all that remained was a blind passion. Jack wasted no time, sliding his hands up my shirt. I arched my back, pressing myself closer, closer, as close as I could possibly be.

We were all touches and kisses, two people blending into one. In an instant our clothes had fallen away, and then it was nothing but bare skin brushing in the darkness, hushed whispers as Jack grazed his teeth against the skin just before my ear. "I love you, Ralph," Jack breathed as he clutched me tightly to him. "With all of my heart, I love you."

For a moment I could see his blue eyes shining through the shadows. "I love you too, Jack," I murmured happily, and from then it was all lost to the ecstasy.

XXXSIMON

I was having the most beautiful dream. It was the sort of dream one tries to cling to, upon waking up. Squeezing their eyes shut as tightly as they can, they try to recapture every detail of the fantasy before reality collides with them.

I used to hate sleeping, and I used to hate waking up. Every time I closed my eyes, it was always the same. Flames licking at the cloudless sky. Memories too painful to bear of a time that hardly seemed real. That was before Roger, though, before we were all reunited and found a sort of peace in the love we'd harbored all along. Now I fell asleep in the arms of my dark angel every night, and when I awoke to see his sleeping form next to me, I felt serenity in the world around me.

That morning, however, it was not Roger I found at my side. The massive bed seemed empty with only my body in it, and I almost had worked myself into a panic when I noticed just what had been placed upon the pillow beside me. I couldn't stop myself from gasping a little as I took it all in. A dozen, perfect red roses rested there, all tied together with a black velvet bow. "Oh, Roger," I murmured, reaching out to finger one of the delicate petals. Wondering to myself how I could possibly have found something so incredibly real.

It didn't take me long to slide my body from the bed and find some clothes to slip into. My skin was still stained with fingerprints from the night before, and that was perfectly alright with me. I wanted to hold onto the memories of every kiss, every touch Roger and I had ever shared. A little something to light the darkness, if ever I might need it.

I found him in the kitchenette, seated at the little table. He was clutching to a cup of coffee like it was the last hope in the world, but his shadowed face instantly lit when he saw me approaching. I'd have given anything to keep that darkness away from him. "Morning," I said cheerily, plopping down onto the chair next to him. "I..I saw the flowers."

I thought that maybe Roger might have blushed a little, but if he did he certainly never would have admitted it. I reached across the table to place my hand lightly upon his own. "Thank you." Roger only shrugged like it was no big deal, when in fact it was. He looked as if he might have said more, but the sound of an opening door silenced us both.

A few seconds later, Jack appeared, his hair all tangled about his face, looking terribly pleased with himself. "I've found the key to life," he said in this dreamy sort of tone that didn't match him at all. "Panda bears." And with that, he turned sharply and disappeared back into his room.

Roger and I exchanged a very startled look before we both burst out into laughter. It felt so, so good to laugh, grasping his hand and forgetting everything that wasn't him. In times like these, the island didn't matter and all the haunted memories didn't matter. There was only me and him and Jack and Ralph, just like always. Conquering the world, one day at a time. Because we had each other to hold onto, and sometimes that was enough. Yes, sometimes that was all it took.

"Happy Valentine's Day," I grinned. For once, Roger wasn't scowling, but smiling with a little ethereal glow of his own.

"Love," he scoffed, but the smirk hadnt faded from his lips. "I think that's the answer to most everything."

Sometimes that was all it took.

END


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